Mind Your Kid's Language

Remember your reaction the first time your four-year-old used a four-letter word? Did your mouth drop open, but with no sound coming out? Did you drop your fork at the dinner table? Did your ears turn red? To growing children, toilet talk is as curious as the functions it stands for. To children words are not "dirty" until you tell them so. Be prepared for colorful words to come out of children's mouths.

Children pick up words from all over and try them out. Whether or not they continue to use them depends on how frequently they hear them and the effect these words have on their audience. Kids won't even know what some of the words they hear mean (i.e., the "f-word"). That's why it's wise not to overreact. This stage will pass. Here's how to deal with toilet talk.

• Consider the source. A five-year-old was playing innocently near a group of older female relatives. Suddenly out came a word that silenced the crowd. As the embarrassed mother rushed to hush the little mouth, the great- aunt explained, "He talks just like his dad." Lessen your child's exposure to profanity. Clean up your own language, supervise what comes out of the mouths of your child's friends, and choose television programs carefully.
• Explain to your child, "Some words are not nice to hear. There are so many nice words, let's hear them instead." Explain that some words are not nice to use in certain places. "If you have to go poop at church, come and whisper in Mommy's ear. Or ask to 'go to the bathroom, please'."
• Provide alternatives. If your child by reflex uses obscenities when angry, practice alternative reactions: "I hit my finger -- ouch!" Words release tension, so model alternatives. Try the classics: "darn," "ow," "heck," "shoot," "phooey..." Or use some more original epithets: "fiddlesticks," "Christopher Columbus."
• Ignore. Children learn what words have shock value, and the more the audience reacts the more an encore is likely. After you're sure your child understands the houserules and that certain words are not allowed in public, ignore an occasional lapse. Intensify your praise for nicer alternatives.
• For older children, set the standard of language that you will allow in your home, and stick to it. If your seven-year-old comes in using the "F- word" you should sit down with him and explain exactly why it's offensive. Check out this book for further help:  Dude, That's Rude!: (Get Some Manners) (Laugh & Learn)

Health and Wellness Tips for the Whole Family

1) Begin with Breakfast
Refuel after a good night's sleep by eating a nutritious breakfast. Children who eat breakfast perform better in school and feel more energetic. It doesn't have to take long—eat on the go by bringing along cereal, fruit, yogurt, toast or even leftovers.

2) Keep Moving
Instead of driving, walk, bike or jog to visit friends or to get to school. Skip the escalator or elevator and hit the stairs. A good rule of thumb is incorporating 10 minutes of activity for every hour spent sitting.

3) Nutritious Diet
Select snacks from all levels of the food pyramid by adding a glass of low-fat milk to accompany your crackers, or some celery sticks coated with peanut butter and raisins. Cookies, chips and candy are okay in moderation, but make sure to maintain a good balance of fruits and veggies.

4) Feel the Burn
Show your kids how fun it can be to work up a sweat. Make an effort to do at least 20 minutes of aerobic movement every day (like dancing, running or jogging), and spend a couple days a week working on building muscle with weight lifting. Warm up and cool down with some stretches and deep breathing.

5) Eat Balanced Meals
Be smart about how much and how often you eat heavy, high-calorie foods like hamburgers, french fries and ice cream. You can still enjoy them, but don't forget the fruits and veggies to achieve a balanced diet with proteins, carbohydrates, fats, minerals and vitamins.

6) Work Out Together
Keep fitness fun by inviting family and friends to join you on a hike or biking adventure. You'll have so much fun together, it won't feel like like work!

7) Eat for Energy
Eat foods that energize the body, including grains, fruits and vegetables. These provide carbohydrates, vitamins, minerals and fiber. Try enjoying whole-wheat breads and fresh fruits and veggies.

8) Stay Fit at School
Physical education, intramural sports and dance teams are just some of the ways to get active during the weekdays!

9) Piece Together A Healthy Food Puzzle
Everything you eat is a different puzzle piece in your diet. Create a picture of good health by balancing out your meals with fresh fruits and veggies. Add a side salad to that slice of pizza, and snack on an apple instead of a donut.

10) Keep It Fun and Fresh
Make healthy eating and fitness fun by trying new snacks, outdoor activities and sports. For a guaranteed good time, invite your friends to join in on your adventures. Remember that goals are there to motivate you, so set realistic ones that are achievable with time and discipline. Health and happiness go hand in hand!

Recommended reading : The Wellness Workbook : How to Achieve Enduring Health and Vitality



www.HyperSmash.com Ping Blog Ping your blog

How To Be A Better Dad

Fathers play an important role in the psychological, behavioral and academic development of their children.  Here are ten ways for dads to make the most of this very special role.

1. Respect Your Children's Mother: One of the best things a father can do for his children is to respect their mother. If you are married, keep your marriage strong and vital. If you're not married, it is still important to respect and support the mother of your children. A father and mother who respect each other, and let their children know it, provide a secure environment for them. When children see their parents respecting each other, they are more likely to feel that they are also accepted and respected.
2. Spend Time With Your Children: How a father spends his time tells his children what's important to him. If you always seem to busy for your children, they will feel neglected no matter what you say. Treasuring children often means sacrificing other things, but it is essential to spend time with your children. Kids grow up so quickly. Missed opportunities are forever lost.
3. Earn The Right To Be Heard: All too often the only time a father speaks to his children is when they have done something wrong. That's why so many children cringe when their mother says, "Your father wants to talk with you." Begin talking with your kids when they are very young so that difficult subjects will be easier to handle as they get older. Take time and listen to their ideas and problems.
4. Discipline With Love: All children need guidance and discipline, not as punishment, but to set reasonable limits. Remind your children of the consequences of their actions and provide meaningful rewards for desirable behavior. Fathers who discipline in a calm and fair manner show love for their children.
5. Be A Role Model: Fathers are role models to their kids whether they realize it or not. A girl who spends time with a loving father grows up knowing she deserves to be treated with respect by boys, and what to look for in a husband. Fathers can teach sons what is important in life by demonstrating honesty, humility and responsibility. "All the world's a stage..." and a father plays one of the most vital roles.
6. Be A Teacher: Too many fathers think teaching is something others do. But a father who teaches his children about right and wrong, and encourages them to do their best, will see his children make good choices. Involved fathers use everyday examples to help their children learn the basic lessons of life.
7. Eat Together As A Family: Sharing a meal together (breakfast, lunch or dinner) can be an important part of healthy family life. In addition to providing some structure in a busy day, it gives kids the chance to talk about what they are doing and want to do. It is also a good time for fathers to listen and give advice. Most importantly, it is a time for families to be together each day.
8. Read To Your Children: In a world where television often dominates the lives of children, it is important that fathers make the effort to read to their children. Children learn best by doing and reading, as well as seeing and hearing. Begin reading to your children when they are very young. When they are older encourage them to read on their own. Instilling your children with a love for reading is one of the best ways to ensure they will have a lifetime of personal and career growth.
9. Show Affection: Children need the security that comes from knowing they are wanted, accepted and loved by their family. Parents, especially fathers, need to feel both comfortable and willing to hug their children. Showing affection everyday is the best way to let your children know that you love them.
10. Realize That A Father's Job Is Never Done: Even after children are grown and ready to leave home, they will still look to their fathers for wisdom and advice. Whether it's continued schooling, a new job or a wedding, fathers continue to play an essential part in the lives of their children as they grow and, perhaps, marry and build their own families.

Blog Pinger Free Ping your blog

How To Control Your Anger

Anger is a normal emotion that is bound to pop up in your life, but it can quickly become a runaway train that damages relationships and your own state of mind. The difference is whether you control your anger or let it control you. When your temper flares, these techniques can help you tame the flames and work through whatever ticked you off in the first place.

1) Walk Away
If you tend to speak first and think later, step away from the people whose feelings you could hurt. Removing yourself from the situation, at least temporarily, is the quickest way to diffuse your temper and prevent saying something you'll have to apologize for later. Try to avoid slamming doors on your way out.

2) Set A Date To Argue
While walking away is a good short term solution, it's not a permanent fix - especially for relationship issues. If you have to take a time out because of your anger, let the other person know you plan to talk later when you're feeling more in control of your emotions. Saying something as simple as, "I need 15 minutes," is an easy way to give yourself space. This reduces the risk of someone chasing after you when you're trying to get some distance.

3) Concentrate On Your Breath
You're always breathing, whether you're angry or not. When your emotions start to get the best of you, center yourself by focusing on that automatic process. Pay attention to whether or not you're inhaling through your nose or mouth, holding your breath, and how quickly or slowly you're exhaling.

4) Take A Break With Nature
Nature is good for the body and mind. Find yourself a patch of green, a bird to watch, or a seat in the sun. Being outside won't solve your problems, but it will calm you down and help you unclench your jaw so that you can start thinking about possible solutions.

5) Move Your Body
Anger often causes physical reactions: clenched teeth, curled fingers, tense shoulders. Doing a little exercise will help you relax your body, which can lead to a more relaxed mind. More strenuous activity can also be a good way to work out aggression.

6) Express Yourself
 Once you've given yourself time to calm down, it's important to express your feelings. Focus on "I" language - "I feel" instead of "you did". Be respectful, but don't be afraid of being honest, even if it makes someone else angry.

You might want to read The Anger Control Workbook or Rage: A Step-by-Step Guide to Overcoming Explosive Anger 


Ping your blog Ping Blog Hyper Smash

A Child Memo To His Parent

1. Don't spoil me. I know quite well that I ought not to have all I ask for. I'm only testing you.

2. Don't be afraid to be firm with me. I prefer it, it makes me feel secure.

3. Don't let me form bad habits. I have to rely on you to detect them in the early stages.

4. Don't make me feel smaller than I am. It only makes me behave stupidly "big".

5. Don't correct me in front of people if you can help it. I'll take much more notice if you talk quietly with me in private.

6. Don't make me feel that my mistakes are sins. It upsets my sense of values.

7. Don't protect me from consequences. I need to learn the painful way sometimes.

8. Don't be too upset when I say "I hate you". Sometimes it isn't you I hate but your power to thwart me.

9. Don't take too much notice of my small ailments. Sometimes they get me the attention I need.

10. Don't nag. If you do, I shall have to protect myself by appearing deaf.

11. Don't forget that I cannot explain myself as well as I should like. That is why I am not always accurate.

12. Don't put me off when I ask questions. If you do, you will find that I stop asking and seek my information elsewhere.

13. Don't be inconsistent. That completely confuses me and makes me lose faith in you.

14. Don't tell me my fears are silly. They are terribly real and you can do much to reassure me if you try to understand.

15. Don't ever suggest that you are perfect or infallible. It gives me too great a shock when I discover that you are neither.

16. Don't ever think that it is beneath your dignity to apologize to me. An honest apology makes me feel surprisingly warm towards you.

17. Don't forget I love experimenting. I couldn't get along without it, so please put up with it.

18. Don't forget how quickly I am growing up. It must be very difficult for you to keep pace with me, but please do try.

19. Don't forget that I don't thrive without lots of love and understanding, but I don't need to tell you, do I?

20. Please keep yourself fit and healthy. I need you.



Ping your blog Ping site HyperSmash.com

Are You Suffering From These 4 Tech Afflictions ?

Quick: How many devices do you have on-hand at this very moment? How often have you checked your social media accounts in the last hour? When was the last time you played a video game?
The answers to these questions may seem inconsequential, but tech addiction is real, and it can have dreadful consequences.

People addicted to the Internet may experience chemical changes in their brains similar to those of alcoholics and other drug addicts. And that’s just the Internet — think about all the other aspects of technology we succumb to every day. Check out the following ailments that you should avoid at all costs.

1. Phantom Vibration Syndrome
Do you ever reach for your cellphone because you feel it vibrating, only to discover that it hadn’t buzzed at all? This could be what many call “phantom vibration syndrome,” the sufferers of which feel vibrations even when their devices are in an entirely different room.

The name is most likely based on phantom limb syndrome, a condition in which someone who has lost a limb experiences sensory hallucinations that it is still attached to the body and functioning. Similarly, those with phantom vibration syndrome feel their phones as extensions of themselves. Those who say they heavily use mobile devices usually experience phantom vibrations. It’s common, and you’re able to recover from it.

2. Internet Addiction Disorder
Internet addiction disorder (IAD) refers to compulsory use of the Internet, such that it interferes with daily life. Studies show that addiction to the Internet can cause the same type of social problems as other established addictions, such as gambling. It’s important to note, however, that it is not yet recognized as a disorder in the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.

3. Social Media Addiction
Considered a subdivision of Internet addiction, social media addiction is probably one of the more common tech addictions of late. According to a study, checking social networking sites for updates is a much harder habit to break than alcohol or tobacco.

4. Video Game Addiction

Video game addiction, like IAD and other addictions, is characterized by the interference of gaming with other aspects of life. Although it is not yet considered an official addiction by the American Medical Association, video game overuse has led to terrible consequences.

How much is too much tech? It all depends. If you or your kids are obsessive or over indulgence over the above, do seek expert help before it ruins your life or your children. Or you can read this self help book,  Cyber Junkie: Escape the Gaming and Internet Trap  or  Video Games & Your Kids: How Parents Stay in Control


Ping your blog Ping Blog Hypersmash.com

Parenting Tips For Tweens

The tween years are an exciting and challenging time for your child -- and for you. This stage in your child's life occurs in that brief, eruptive time between (thus the name "tween") early childhood and the teenage years. No longer is your little princess playing make-believe in the confines of your backyard; she's now roaming shopping malls with her friends. And your darling baby boy may be thinking less about his toy T-Rex and more about sex. Tweenhood is a game-changer for all involved.

So if your child is between the ages of 8 and 12, throw out all of your old parenting books -- you'll need a new set of guidelines for the years ahead. Here are 10 tips you'll need for parenting your tween.

1) Go Ahead and Grieve the Passing of the Early Childhood Years

Your child is still a child. He or she hasn't yet reached adolescence, but is quickly leaving the early childhood years behind. The years that, for you, were filled with touching, adorable firsts -- the first time she said "Mama, I love you," or the first time he made a card for you. As a parent, you're always going to think your child is growing up too fast, and you'll likely always look back on the sweet early years with longing. But don't look at the tween years as the death of childhood; look at them as another stage in your child's metamorphosis. Yes, you'll miss the blanket forts and games of hide-and-seek. And there's nothing wrong with fondly reminiscing about those years -- just remember that the tween years will have many firsts of their own.

2) Independence or Boundaries: Walk the Line
Next to drugs and sex, independence for your child is probably one of the things you fear most as a parent. It means your child, whose safety and well-being mean everything to you, is suddenly out in the world (or even sometimes at home) learning to make decisions on his or her own. It's tricky. You must learn how to go against your instincts and encourage this new found independence. And to top it off, you must still enforce boundaries for tweens, who suddenly know it all and can do it all. It's a fine line, but learning to walk it will benefit your child's self-esteem and your sanity.

3) Protect Privacy, but Squash Secrecy
The closer your tween gets to the teenage years, the greater his or her need will be for privacy. He'll be less open about his day at school, or she'll spend more time behind closed doors chatting with her friends. In day-to-day life, staying abreast of your tween's life means communicating effectively -- which, of course, is one of those things that is never as easy as it sounds. You can do this by relating stories (realistic and maybe even embarrassing) of your own tweenhood, simply pointing out that you've noticed something has been troubling him or her, or suggesting they talk to another trusted adult (your sister always wants to pull the cool aunt card, so don't be afraid to put her to work on this).

4) Brush up on Your Computer Skills
The current tween generation, iGeneration, is often defined by massive communication consumption and technological multi-tasking -- Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, instant messaging, text messaging, MP3 downloads and more. On one hand, you must ensure their safety and help them manage their time; on the other, you want them to enjoy social acceptance within their peer group. As a parent, you must decide what this balance will be. And you must also be prepared to monitor online activities. Just know that your tech-savvy tween, who speaks technology as a second language, may be able to quickly outsmart your monitoring techniques. So it won't hurt to brush up on your own online media and social networking skills.

5) Learn How to Deal with Bullies -- and the Bullied
Bullying is not a new phenomenon. Too bad dealing with bullying in the real world these days isn't as simple. Bullies have more outlets -- such as online social networking sites -- to intimidate their victims. So, dealing with these tormenters often takes subtle and creative action. Tell your child to always stick with friends, and enlist the help of older siblings or cousins. Also, teach him or her to control anger around bullies, and remove any bully incentives, like lunch money. It also wouldn't hurt to contact a teacher at your tween's school.

6) Know Your Tween's Friends ... and Frenemies
Tween friendships can be intense. One day your daughter is making a friendship bracelet for her best friend, the next day they aren't speaking. Or your son and his buddy were inseparable until one joined the basketball team and the other the science club. As your tween grows, he or she will use friendships to gauge his or her place in the world. But just know you may have to deal with possible bad influences. So, try to get to know your tween's friends. Invite them over and get to know their families. Just know that who's who in your child's circle can change at a moment's notice.

7) Battle Body Image Blues
One of the realities of tweenhood is that a child's body image-- and self-esteem -- can take a real beating during these years. For a boy, this may mean anxiety about being smaller and less developed than others in his peer group. Girls can sometimes obsess over their bodies and go to extremes to emulate what they see as ideal in other girls their age. If it goes unchecked, this can lead to depression and eating disorders.
So what can you do to help encourage a healthy body image for your tween? For starters, you can make sure you avoid making critical comments about your child's appearance -- or your own. Family activities, like regularly having dinner together, go a long way toward improving tween self-esteem and reducing the likelihood of eating disorders, proving that sometimes the simplest approaches work best.

8) Don't Make the Sex Talk a One-time Thing
The sex talk. Admit it, just thinking about it makes you wince. And your tween is even less eager to talk to you about it. Yet, it has to be done. You may think your child is too young for such a discussion, but you only have to turn on MTV or eavesdrop on a group of middle-schoolers to learn that it's a hot topic in the tween world.
As they approach and enter puberty tweens' curiosity about sex will naturally grow. Add to that a sex-obsessed pop culture, and you have a dangerous combination. That's why, rather than just having a one-time sex talk with your child, you should instead have an open dialogue that allows either of you to bring the topic up at any time. Some suggested readings at http://amzn.to/Ns8Mlz and http://amzn.to/LtiAcm

9) Pursue Pop Culture Connections
If you know who Demi Lovato, Justin Bieber, Nick Jonas and Selena Gomez are, you're probably either a tween or the parent of a tween. And while the specific celebrities and fads worthy of teenybopper worship may change from year to year, pop culture fascination persists. This presents a great way for you to bond with your tween: Get to know his or her celebrity crushes, sports heroes and favorite fashion trends. Take your tween and his or her friends to see the hottest new tween flick on opening day, or take them on a shopping trip to pick out room décor in their favorite new trend. Be warned, though, you run the risk of being lame rather than cool if your pop culture knowledge is painfully out of date.

10) Prepare for All of This to Get Tougher
If you think your child's tween years are challenging, just wait until the teen years. Fortunately, you can use these middle years to pave the way for junior high and beyond. A key advantage the tween years have over early childhood years: the chance to build, strengthen and fortify your relationship with your child. During this time, you'll be in between directly controlling your child's behavior (early childhood) and having little control at all (teen years). How you're able to influence and teach your child in the coming years will, in part, be based on the sturdiness of your relationship now.

Hyper Smash Ping Blog Ping your blog

Children Learn What They Live

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.

If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.

If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.

If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.

If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.

If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.

If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.

If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.

If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.

If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.

If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.

If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.

If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.

If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.




www.HyperSmash.com Ping Blog Ping your blog

How To Get Your Kid To Listen To You

A major part of discipline is learning how to talk with children. The way you talk to your child teaches him how to talk to others. Here are some tips on how to get your kids to listen to you :

1. Connect Before You Direct

Before giving your child directions, squat to your child's eye level and engage your child in eye-to-eye contact to get his attention. Teach him how to focus: "Mary, I need your eyes." "Billy, I need your ears." Offer the same body language when listening to the child. Be sure not to make your eye contact so intense that your child perceives it as controlling rather than connecting.

 

2. Address The Child

Open your request with the child's name, "Lauren, will you please..."

 

3. Stay Brief

We use the one-sentence rule: Put the main directive in the opening sentence. The longer you ramble, the more likely your child is to become parent-deaf. Too much talking is a very common mistake when dialoging about an issue. It gives the child the feeling that you're not quite sure what it is you want to say. If she can keep you talking she can get you sidetracked.

 

4. Stay Simple

Use short sentences with one-syllable words. Listen to how kids communicate with each other and take note. When your child shows that glazed, disinterested look, you are no longer being understood.

 

5. Ask Your Child to Repeat the Request Back to You

If he can't, it's too long or too complicated.

 

6. Make an offer the child can't refuse

You can reason with a two or three-year-old, especially to avoid power struggles. "Get dressed so you can go outside and play." Offer a reason for your request that is to the child's advantage, and one that is difficult to refuse. This gives her a reason to move out of her power position and do what you want her to do.

 

7. Be Positive

Instead of "no running," try: "Inside we walk, outside you may run."

 

8. Begin your Directives With "I want."

Instead of "Get down," say "I want you to get down." Instead of "Let Ricky have a turn," say "I want you to let Ricky have a turn now." This works well with children who want to please but don't like being ordered. By saying "I want," you give a reason for compliance rather than just an order.

 

9. "When...Then."

"When you get your teeth brushed, then we'll begin the story." "When your work is finished, then you can watch TV." "When," which implies that you expect obedience, works better than "if," which suggests that the child has a choice when you don't mean to give him one.

 

10. Legs First, Mouth Second

Instead of ordering, "Turn off the TV, it's time for dinner!" walk into the room where your child is watching TV, join in with your child's interests for a few minutes, and then, during a commercial break, have your child turn off the TV. Going to your child conveys you're serious about your request; otherwise children interpret this as a mere preference.

 

11. Give Choices

"Do you want to put your pajamas on or brush your teeth first?" "Red shirt or blue one?"

 

12. Speak Developmentally Correctly

The younger the child, the shorter and simpler your directives should be. Consider your child's level of understanding. For example, a common error parents make is asking a three-year- old, "Why did you do that?" Most adults can't always answer that question about their behavior. Try instead, "Let's talk about what you did."

 

13. Speak Socially Correctly

Even a two-year-old can learn "please." Expect your child to be polite. Children shouldn't feel manners are optional. Speak to your children the way you want them to speak to you.

 

14. Speak Psychologically Correctly

Threats and judgmental openers are likely to put the child on the defensive. "You" messages make a child clam up. "I" messages are non-accusing. Instead of "You'd better do this..." or "You must...," try "I would like...." or "I am so pleased when you..." Instead of "You need to clear the table," say "I need you to clear the table." Don't ask a leading question when a negative answer is not an option. "Will you please pick up your coat?" Just say, "Pick up your coat, please."

 

15. Write It

Reminders can evolve into nagging so easily, especially for preteens who feel being told things puts them in the slave category. Without saying a word you can communicate anything you need said. Talk with a pad and pencil. Leave humorous notes for your child. Then sit back and watch it happen.

 

16. Talk The Child Down

The louder your child yells, the softer you respond. Let your child ventilate while you interject timely comments: "I understand" or "Can I help?" Sometimes just having a caring listener available will wind down the tantrum. If you come in at his level, you have two tantrums to deal with. Be the adult for him.

 

17. Settle The Listener

Before giving your directive, restore emotional equilibrium, otherwise you are wasting your time. Nothing sinks in when a child is an emotional wreck.

 

18. Replay Your Message

Toddlers need to be told a thousand times. Children under two have difficulty internalizing your directives. Most three-year-olds begin to internalize directives so that what you ask begins to sink in. Do less and less repeating as your child gets older. Preteens regard repetition as nagging.

 

19. Let Your Child Complete The Thought

Instead of "Don't leave your mess piled up," try: "Think of where you want to store your soccer stuff." Letting the child fill in the blanks is more likely to create a lasting lesson.

 

20. Use Rhyme Rules

"If you hit, you must sit." Get your child to repeat them.

 

21. Give Likable Alternatives

You can't go by yourself to the park; but you can play in the neighbor's yard.

 

22. Give Advance Notice

"We are leaving soon. Say bye-bye to the toys, bye-bye to the girls…"

 

23. Open Up a Closed Child

Carefully chosen phrases open up closed little minds and mouths. Stick to topics that you know your child gets excited about. Ask questions that require more than a yes or no. Stick to specifics. Instead of "Did you have a good day at school today?" try "What is the most fun thing you did today?"

 

24. Use "When You…I Feel…Because…"

When you run away from mommy in the store I feel worried because you might get lost.

 

25. Close The Discussion

If a matter is really to closed a discussion, say so. "I'm not changing my mind about this. Sorry." You'll save wear and tear on both you and your child. Reserve your "I mean business" tone of voice, when the situation arises.


Ping Blog Ping your blog HyperSmash.com

Differences Between a Bright Child And a Gifted Learner

Bright Child                vs                                Gifted Learner
  

- Knows the answers.                                    - Asks the questions.

- Is interested.                                                 - Is highly curious. 

- Is attentive.                                                    - Is mentally and physically involved.

- Has good ideas.                                          - Has wild, silly ideas.

- Works hard.                                                  - Plays around, yet tests well.

- Answers the questions.                               - Discusses in detail, elaborates.

- Top group.                                                     - Beyond the group.

- Listens with interest.                                    - Shows strong feelings and opinions. 
- Learns with ease.                                         - Already knows.

- 6-8 repetitions for mastery.                         - 1-2 repetitions for mastery.

- Understands ideas.                                     - Constructs abstractions.

- Enjoys peers.                                               - Prefers adults.

- Grasps the meaning.                                   - Draws inferences.

- Completes assignments.                             - Initiates projects.

- Is receptive.                                                  - Is intense.

- Copies accurately.                                       - Creates new design.

- Enjoys school.                                              - Enjoys learning.

- Absorbs information.                                   - Manipulates information.

- Technician.                                                   - Inventor.

- Good memorizer.                                        - Good guesser

- Is alert                                                           - Is keenly observant.

- Is pleased with own learning.                     - Is highly self-critical.

                          

                                                          

Ping your blog Ping Blog HyperSmash

Ways To Get Your Child To Succeed

All children have basic needs that, if met, will facilitate success in school.

Every child needs AT LEAST ONE ADULT who is a positive role model.
Educators and other professionals can nurture this by demonstrating concern for each student, and/or by encouraging a parent, relative, or other pro social adult to become involved in the child’s life.

Every child needs TO FEEL ACCEPTED.
Educators and other professionals can advance this by treating each child fairly and by appreciating his/her uniqueness. Provide opportunities for a child’s culture, exceptionality, or other differentiating characteristics to be acknowledged and valued.

Every child needs RECOGNITION.
Educators and other professionals can promote this by taking time to discover each child’s strengths and help him/her build on them. Furnish opportunities for children to develop skills and talents. Recognize and celebrate small accomplishments such as: running fast, getting a high grade, drawing well, playing ball, singing a song, controlling ones temper, or acting in a play. Acknowledge all successes. Share accomplishments with a parent in person, via phone, or through notes.

Every child needs A SENSE OF BELONGING.
Educators and other professionals can foster this by building a community in which everyone contributes and feels a part. Cultivate cooperation rather than competition and compassion rather than thoughtlessness. Work closely within the school and/or community to support meaningful opportunities for children to share their time, talents, and goods with others.

Every child needs TO FEEL SAFE AND SECURE.
Educators and other professionals can help a child feel protected by providing a structured, predictable environment that is free from harassment. Realize that for a child to thrive, adults in his/her life must be responsive to their needs. If abuse is present in the home, take the steps necessary to protect the child.

Every child needs SOME CONTROL over his/her environment.
Educators and other professionals can further this by sharing power with students, thus demonstrating adult interest and respect. Provide opportunities for students to make decisions regarding rules and activities.

Every child needs SOCIAL INTERACTION SKILLS.
Educators and other professionals can help children develop these by role playing and by encouraging friendships with peers through group work. Supply cross-age interaction during school. For example, have older students present programs, tutor, or lead discussions with younger children. Offer a variety of activities, organizations, clubs, and/or interest groups that foster social competence.

Every child needs TO ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY for his/her behavior.
Educators and other professionals can foster responsible choices by holding students accountable for the decisions they make. Teach decision-making skills through discussion, role playing, and by providing opportunities for children to use problem-solving skills.


Ping site Ping your blog www.HyperSmash.com

Tips On How To Get Your Kids To Do What You Want

Have you ever been so frustrated with your child that you threatened or yelled at him? If so, did that stop the behavior? Punishment is a short-term, reactive solution to bad behavior. It makes your child feel angry, guilty and resentful, and it ultimately ebbs away at a healthy parent-child relationship. Find out the secret to making long-lasting, positive changes to your youngster’s behavior.

Punishment means using techniques like yelling and spanking to reduce bad behavior. Positive discipline means patiently guiding your child so that he learns good behavior. You set firm limits and teach your child problem solving skills so that he’ll build up a positive self-image. In the long run, your child learns self-control and cooperation.These five techniques will help you create a positive and nurturing environment for your kid—and get him to do what you want!  

1) Manage the Environment
Keep an eye on your child’s surroundings, and minimize the opportunities he has to misbehave. Once your child starts crawling and walking, childproof your home so that fragile items are out of reach of grabby fingers. Kids sometimes misbehave out of boredom, so keep your child busy with constructive activities and items to explore. (For example, keep an activities basket handy for long car rides.)  

2) Set Clear Rules and Limits
When you have too many rules, it’s hard for your kid (and you!) to keep track of them all. Set clear limits by picking rules that are vital for your child to know given his age. For a toddler, focus on safety rules like “Stay in the yard.” For an older child, set expectations around doing homework and chores. Try to phrase your rules with positive language. Instead of saying “Don’t run,” say “Please walk.”  

3) Praise Good Behavior
Catch your kid being good. (“I see that you’re helping your younger sister tie her shoes. Great job!”) This positive reinforcement will help him repeat appropriate behaviors.  

4) Reason With Him
If your child misbehaves, calmly explain to him what the rules are and why he needs to comply. Your compassion and patience will show him how to handle conflict in a positive way. This discussion will also give him a chance to express his view. 

5) If Necessary, Dole Out an Appropriate Punishment
If you’ve done these four steps and your child continues to misbehave, you may need to punish him. Don’t resort to hitting or yelling. Instead, come up with a solution that takes your child’s age into consideration. For a younger child, give her a timeout (about one minute per year of your child’s age) so that he can reflect on his actions. For an older child, temporarily take away a privilege. Explain your reasoning for the punishment. And praise your child when his behavior improves.



Ping Blog HyperSmash.com Ping your blog